tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-77761706395661359242024-03-13T06:52:41.948-07:00Introvert Bordering ExtrovertAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.comBlogger23125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-5677730648056217982014-09-28T23:23:00.001-07:002014-09-28T23:23:09.979-07:00On timeI have had this blog for an entire year- wow. <div><br><div><span style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; line-height: 22px; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392);">Funny thing about time- it always goes quickest when we don't notice it. Days months years may pass and we don't really realize it. You know that feeling sometimes when it hits you all at once. Wow! Am i really going to be eighteen? Wow! Did i really go to work everyday this week? the things we hate it goes so slowly in the moment and then as soon as we look back on it a part of it was lost, it doesn't seem so long or horrible. We regret doing it, yes. But we go anyway regardless of the idea of wasted time. Some people love wasting time, unfortunately I'm one of those people. I waste time and I'm bored with time and I'm never going to get those weeks of wasted time back.</span></div></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-20482879707738614202014-09-28T23:16:00.001-07:002014-09-28T23:16:52.619-07:00Charity<span style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; line-height: 22px; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392);">My hands will never be large enough, or quick enough to catch all of the falling tears. Nor will i be strong enough to relieve others' burdens. I can only put bandaids on. I can only do so much, for i too, am sick.</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-22224894082599235702014-07-13T15:37:00.002-07:002014-10-05T21:57:57.715-07:00The Hanging<div class="MsoNormal">
I hung with my hands against the wall, mere inches of myself
keeping me hanging of the side of the building. The window edges were poking
from the flat expanse of wall. The earth was a ghastly 200 miles from the
ground. The asphalt was simmering in the hot sun. The people mill about with
their hands in the pockets, or sides swinging like great mills that are lacking
the wind to propel themselves forward. The feet of many a suffering man (and by
man I mean all humanity) shuffling along sidewalks. Wearing down the concrete
slabs until nubs remained from the fingers of earth. My body hung like wet
laundry from the silver sheet of glass. The gravity pulls strongly on my shoes,
weighing down the black bricks, the asphalt calling them down in order to give
them a maternal kiss. My fingers, white with the tension, bone hooking onto the
red surface. I inched to the side,
slipping just a little bit lower every raise of my hand. My heart fails to send
more blood to my hands, the blood slipped down into and around my neck, each beat
brought new heat surging. Cold hands, dangling limbs, throbbing heart, burning
lungs. All slipped across the building. The sun plastered the light on to only
half of the building. The building; half eaten and still, was predominating out
of the earth, jagged teeth against smoky dark. The fingers of the right hand slipping down
below the sill, tilting my body violently to the side, I swung back, a pendulum
against the flat surface. I managed to wedge my foot onto a close by metal ledge.
I stepped to relieve my sweaty cold fingers from the crumbly earth for a
moment. But my legs, failing me, I slumped down again. I took a deep breath and
re-administered the pressure; I managed to straighten myself that way, pulling
with more effort this time from my arms. I took the next step bringing myself
about 3 feet from freedom. My arms and lungs were burning with the exertion. I
managed to haul my body to the gray dented fire escape, reaching relief. My
head bursting with blood now, I rolled myself over the hand rail and landed with
a shivering thump on the cool surface. I lay there and breathed for thirty
seconds, laughing out my relief, and my head felt clear again I sat up slowly,
my body aching and shaking I hoisted
myself to my feet using the handrail as my support. I tittered down the stairs
slowly and with effort towards the dark empty street, my arms swinging
like great mills that were lacking the wind.<o:p></o:p></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-69787103640647976862014-07-13T15:17:00.003-07:002014-07-13T15:17:55.128-07:00On Words<span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.600000381469727px;">Although words may be able to describe all</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.600000381469727px;">Its the music without words that holds true emotion</span><br style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.600000381469727px; outline: none 0px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.600000381469727px;">The voice of humanity without mouths to breathe it</span><br style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.600000381469727px; outline: none 0px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.600000381469727px;">Purity convoluted into obscurity by the precise impulses of our brain</span><br style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.600000381469727px; outline: none 0px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.600000381469727px;">It is my regret that words cannot speak all</span><br style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.600000381469727px; outline: none 0px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.600000381469727px;">Our primitive system cannot hold all of our meanings</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-79560102951069316172014-07-11T22:45:00.000-07:002014-07-11T22:45:09.556-07:00On freedom<div style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.600000381469727px; margin-bottom: 10px; outline: none 0px;">
It is human nature to want freedom. Absolute freedom. Bound by no one and nothing. Not by Man, Not even by God. We wish to ascend the highest points of heaven and then go even further. But we shut ourselves in cages the moment we are born. It is those who are above us (in the hierarchies of society) have created these cages. Those people who decide what we want and who we are.</div>
<div style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.600000381469727px; outline: none 0px;">
It is we the young who see these cages the clearest. When we try to cast them off; more cages are thrust upon us, much like how a scab forms on an open wound. The permanent scars of illusion have not yet formed. We try to rip our cages off - it is painful. These cages have become a part of us and we wish not to be in pain. But it is necessary. In order to live - your caged parts must die. It is harsh i know. But for freedom- you must. Take courage, lift your eyes to the truth and rip yourself from the security of the cage and fly free unburdened past the heavens.</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-7963325504506135082014-06-22T17:26:00.000-07:002014-09-28T23:18:12.422-07:00RealityAwaken and realise it was nothing but a dreamAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-91640211657110937102014-04-07T14:07:00.001-07:002014-04-07T14:07:20.705-07:00CondemnationCondemnation is the fate<br />
of women who think.<br />
<br />
God please forbid a woman<br />
for having opinions on subjects<br />
her little child mind could not possibly<br />
comprehend, understand, fathom<br />
<br />
God please, get this bitch out<br />
who does she think she is,<br />
a man? only men assert themselves<br />
women should be passive<br />
<br />
God please, her innocence is soiled<br />
with impure thoughts and unnatural tendencies<br />
let men protect and provide for her<br />
if she falls out of line give men the strength<br />
to put her back where she belongs<br />
<br />
Condemnation for women who think<br />
Condemnation for women who are leaders<br />
Condemnation for women who "sin"<br />
Condemnation for women.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-51324109031430164872014-03-08T17:20:00.001-08:002014-03-08T17:20:27.715-08:00AgitatedI find myself speaking<div>The words hissing spitting</div><div>My teeth clackity clacking</div><div>My anger rising, burning, cooking my innards</div><div>As i spit irrationalities and swords</div><div>Duck! You who encounter me!</div><div>Flee! You good-intentioned mothers and sisters!</div><div>Run! For i cannot be brought down!</div><div>All is doomed and lost for the kind-hearted, around me</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-42615133128655357302014-02-25T19:13:00.001-08:002014-06-19T19:37:49.259-07:00Wooden mouths<div>
False words fall out of wooden mouths</div>
<div>
Mouths hungry As they breath soot, singing with flame</div>
<div>
their want overpowers<br />
The strings shift, pulling the limbs up and around<br />
dastardly deeds done by devils</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-63622683946546107432014-02-25T19:04:00.001-08:002015-05-01T09:19:24.098-07:00Steel coatWords say nothing that cannot be said with howls and wails<br />
<div>
Screams that pierce the flesh and hammer in nails</div>
<div>
Worn like coats just as kings wear their crowns<br />
Just as cruel carefree kings stroll their grounds</div>
<div>
Glitter cruelly above them mocking them<br />
<br /></div>
<div>
See all that u cannot possess, small thing?!</div>
<div>
See all of your dreams unobtainable?</div>
<div>
We make it so.<br />
<br /></div>
<div>
Grief coats they wear filled with despair</div>
<div>
Steel coats forged by many hands, their hands shake</div>
<div>
Casting eyes about they despair, they bleed</div>
<div>
Offering up their hope to be eaten</div>
<div>
Decimated, they trudge through ruts bowed head</div>
<div>
Quiet Death following closely their quiet steps</div>
<div>
Hematic, murderous days of hopelessness</div>
<div>
The jewels whisper, we make it so.<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-84131389263379648852014-01-24T21:44:00.001-08:002014-02-27T08:53:18.427-08:00why cry?speak to me of despair<br>
and i will not disappoint<br>
though i have the world at my hands<br>something is missing<br>
<br>
a part of me is sleeping or dead<br>
my tongue in cheek<br>
my lies that don't need to be told<br>
i wish oh i wish i was alive<br>
<br>
Everything going<br>
nothing leaving<br>
tears spring to my eyes<br>
oh why oh why do i cry?Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-56311935253499196662014-01-24T21:27:00.004-08:002014-01-24T21:27:37.315-08:00LivingWhat makes men live?<br />
is it the sound that the wind makes through the tress<br />
the sound of the waves kissing the shoreline<br />
the sound of feet hitting pavement<br />
the feel of the breeze through their hair<br />
the sight of the sun waking up<br />
<br />
First ask<br />
What drives men?<br />
Love<br />
Purpose<br />
Passion<br />
<br />
How do you feel alive?<br />
connections with other people<br />
taking risks<br />
having funAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-16867073393757058062014-01-21T19:22:00.001-08:002014-02-14T18:19:25.102-08:00Poetrypoetry isn't very popular<br>
prose is better right?<br>
<br>
the rythmeless lines wind<br>
around around your mind<br>
a maze, feeling as if you are going<br>
but really staying<br>
<br>In the same place<div>As to where you first started<br>
<br>
<br></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-15307011293499799072014-01-21T19:18:00.003-08:002014-01-21T19:18:45.814-08:00dreaming again?Do you ever get the feeling that this is all a dream<br />
a dream to wake from a dream to watch<br />
<br />
watching this dream is so unreal<br />
nothing makes sense<br />
it all blends together<br />
a capital offence<br />
<br />
this dream i once had, it hasn't ended yet<br />
despite short breaks it doesn't cease<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-71474664270918995932014-01-21T19:17:00.001-08:002014-01-21T19:17:27.510-08:00a rant that should be in my diaryso uninspired<br />
blank sheet that is my mind<br />
i cannot blindly stumble unto this<br />
endeavor, i have to know<br />
i need to know how to begin<br />
to begin<br />
beginning is the most difficult part<br />
it'll take me days to even think of skeletons<br />
of what it could be<br />
<br />
I am not a fountain of inspiration,<br />
though i am a fountain of life<br />
i am not creative<br />
i simply try to speak the truth<br />
when i lie, it rots<br />
it festers inside my guts until<br />
<br />
POW<br />
<br />
I'm lying on the ground crying,<br />
please im sorry<br />
i don't know whats wrong with me<br />
but i do know, i do i do<br />
i make walls, walls with spikes on both sides<br />
spikes that pierce the flesh of innocents<br />
<br />
I AM A MEAN PERSON<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-3219884664786880302014-01-21T19:17:00.000-08:002014-01-21T19:17:13.861-08:00choice - don't readalways a choice<br />
always a choice<br />
always a choice<br />
<br />
wrong choice<br />
Hurt choice<br />
sad choice<br />
bad choice<br />
mad choice<br />
<br />
always a choice<br />
i can never pick<br />
never pick never<br />
pick<br />
the right choice<br />
<br />
always wrong<br />
always screwing up<br />
never enough<br />
can't i please stop<br />
<br />
please stop fighting<br />
please stop arguing<br />
i need peace,<br />
i need peas<br />
i need to eat<br />
i need to stop<br />
<br />
i need to do somthing else<br />
focus on something else<br />
look at the light<br />
like water-falling<br />
the dust dancing<br />
spreading over everything<br />
<br />
this isn't real, girl<br />
this isn't real<br />
this isn't<br />
isn't<br />
isn't<br />
isn't<br />
<br />
biting the inside of my cheek<br />
flesh comes off<br />
i bite the other side<br />
blood<br />
this isn't real<br />
no choice<br />
no choices in wonderland, only fate<br />
no choice<br />
<br />
always A CHOICE<br />
there will always be A CHOICE<br />
god i'm insane aren't i?<br />
Do other people feel like this?Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-39324447204807235232014-01-13T20:23:00.000-08:002014-01-13T20:23:18.729-08:00Preacher you can't save mePreacher you can't save me now<br />
my heart is as black as the devil's<br />
now<br />
<br />
Scripture won't save me now<br />
no amount of praise or apologies<br />
will do<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-1736812396982925812014-01-13T20:20:00.001-08:002014-04-21T16:49:11.679-07:00word flowwrite as it comes to you<br />
oh little lady with lots of hair<br />
fingers hitting keyboards<br />
like raindrops hitting the sidewalk<br />
don't talk, don't filter<br />
just write<br />
<br />
write as if there is nothing here for you<br />
write as if there is nothing left for you<br />
but broken glass and ashes<br />
these things have been smashed<br />
broken beautiful things<br />
<br />
suits a world of hate<br />
just misunderstood<br />
just holding on, i can't deal with things<br />
right now,<br />
privileged body not used to stress,<br />
not used to pressure,<br />
i will not thrive, i will wilt,<br />
i will falter, i will survive<br />
<br />
my fingers stopp produceding<br />
i misspell words like first graders<br />
i don't givee a damn about munctuation<br />
just trying barely getting my pessage across<br />
p's turn into m's<br />
and ps is an after thought<br />
just like my compassionAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-54685431829912924222013-12-30T14:26:00.000-08:002013-12-30T14:26:01.529-08:00To kill a vampireto kill a vampire<br />
you must push a wooden stake<br />
through its heart.<br />
<br />
to kill a vampire<br />
you must starve it of blood<br />
human life<br />
<br />
to kill a vampire<br />
you must shoot a silver bullet<br />
sickness starts<br />
<br />
Nothing will kill these-<br />
life sucking dead creatures<br />
prey on weak, sick<br />
despicable dark non-breather<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-6234959672152555402013-12-30T14:09:00.001-08:002014-02-23T11:53:22.460-08:00Volcanomy CHEST has turned to FIRE<br>
BURNING BURNING BURNING<br>
my heart is charcoal<br>
eating oxygen<br>
eating my blood<br>
<br>
Red liquid that sustains<br>
like a boat on a sea<br>
oh please oh please<br>
rescue me<br>
<br>
I feel as if i must<br>
get rid of all the<br>
unpleasantness<br>
inside of me<br>
<br>
Ropes curl and knot<br>
in a cavern<div>My belly, burning ice</div><div>Palms sweat</div><div><br></div><div>Swears, curses erupt</div><div>Spewing from my mouth</div><div>Like magma from mountains</div><div>I can't control myself anymore</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-51797563280941664272013-09-12T19:17:00.001-07:002014-09-28T23:18:26.516-07:00the disgraceWith that common lump in my throat<br>
i quivered and shivered, like a fainting goat<br>
i could not speak for water would pour<br>
it would fill the whole ocean up to the shores<br>
<br>
my togune like rotten meat<br>
incapable of speaking of anything sweet<br>
cavernous foul room for a mouth<br>
i will run away to the south<br>
<br>
i hear things are better there<br>
the grass greener there<br>
nobody bothers you there<br>
i can sleep there.<br>
<br>
but for this moment i could not speak<br>
nothing will spill, burst or leak<br>
i am drowning, frozen in place<br>
me, the disgraceAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-16641785357159881792013-09-05T09:48:00.001-07:002013-09-05T09:48:33.611-07:00Dusti am death i am dying<br />
taking away your lungs<br />
i hold you in suspense<br />
waiting watching for a weak moment<br />
where i can take your heart<br />
your brain your stomach<br />
i will take you away<br />
everything you hold dear<br />
your dog your father your mother<br />
all to dust, dust and life everlasting<br />
at least that's what they told me when i was a child<br />
but inside i am still a child calling out for help<br />
for attention, love me feed me clothe me<br />
I am dying please help me<br />
everyone dies alone<br />
i am alone<br />
i have seen no one die but my own<br />
death dying life everlasting<br />
lungs heart stomach<br />
loved ones.<br />
dust.<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09173239837977825830noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7776170639566135924.post-84580009641808754852013-08-30T17:17:00.000-07:002013-10-20T11:02:15.908-07:00hallow where filledstopped short until<br />
<div>
time picks up it's</div>
<div>
aweary bits</div>
<div>
faster faster</div>
<div>
never enough</div>
<div>
faster faster</div>
<div>
all things stop<br />
stop stop stop</div>
<div>
my legs ache</div>
<div>
i can't go on</div>
<div>
please just let me</div>
<div>
close my eyes</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
time doesn't wait,</div>
<div>
it plods on slow<br />
slow slow slow</div>
<div>
never a speed</div>
<div>
right for me</div>
<div>
never stopping</div>
<div>
for little ol' me</div>
<div>
i pant i pull</div>
<div>
i cry i scream</div>
<div>
i just want life</div>
<div>
to happen now</div>
<div>
and leave me be</div>
<div>
please just let me</div>
<div>
run away<br />
its almost to much<br />
to much to mu<br />
<br />
there is emptiness<br />
hallow where filled<br />
i fill with honey<br />
warm gooey viscous<br />
like lightening<br />
i lose all warmth<br />
it drains down my fingers<br />
into the earth<br />
please come back to me<br />
i try to stop up<br />
splitting hollowness<br />
residual hallowness<br />
<br /></div>
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